Friday, December 28, 2012

:( sad story,,,

yesterday, a Smile passed through me,
a wind of past memories cOmforted me,
a playful smiling Face of her was with me,
i was happy, as I thought she was with me.

             today All my smiles passed away,
             as gloomy as always, again became my day
             i realized, she never was with me on my way,
             all i want is you to understand my feelings......

yesterday she poked me,
happy i was and curious i was
today she blocked me
dejected i am and very sorry i am! 

Sunday, October 7, 2012

horizon i own but unexplored....

                                                                                                                                                            lotos yarsa
      thought succeeds thought, 
      what is there between those two thoughts

do you call it a state of non-thought?
or is it itself a thought ?
is it measured in terms of time?
or you see some space?
is it completely ethereal
or nothing like that exists,

where is my mind? my consciousness? 
why am i not aware of that blissful moment?
why my awareness so unaware,
that i never explored this Horizon that I own

        i so wanna linger in that moment, 
      where no good thoughts can lure me,
      where no bad thoughts can disturb me.
      where you don't have the sense of time

space quite enough to spread your hands 
with freedom from the past 
freedom from future,
that would be the perfect NOWness.......

Monday, August 27, 2012

Imagineers.. (curves.. )))

utopia, the "wonderland"
where dreams come to an end 
and you are reSonating 
at the ultimate frequency Of     Nature.
     imagine A world of your            own,
     birds chirping for you
     rivers flowing towards you
     fresh green carpet of grass        only for you,
     stars shining and falling at         your feet,
this is where i belong, 
Meditating on the gentle sound of breeze
in search of wisdom, i wonder in the wonderland
bestowed upon me by a generous, kindhearted person.
     bestowed upon me is the optimism,
     bestowed upon me is the friendship,
     bestowed upon me is the time, (that person spends with me)
     bestowed upon me is the WonderlanD 
     by the generous kindhearted person.

0405hr on 8th august 2012.......

i heard that heart healS with time,
but for me time has ceased ,
i remember the gentle touch of yours
that maneuver all my sorrows away
                i committed a mistake
                i can never take back my mistakes
                but give me a chance fOr penance
                i will even move a mountain.
as i can Feel the pain i have caused you
i want to pamper you for the rest of my years.
i wanna capture the panorama of feelings that i have for you,
how pitiful i am, as i realize it only by now
                i am less worried about my feelings
                I am even scared to imagine how i made                    you feel
                i had lost my mind that i didn't value it
                it is futile to regret now.


the sAcrifices you made for me
i cant repay even in MY hundred lives afterwards
how coward i was,-scared to confess before the world about your love
still you loved me whatever the matter was.
               how dumb of me to get freaked about silly things
               i miss those as they were the gentle expressions of your deepest love.
my dear i realized love is not meant for a man like me
neither do i deserved to be loved nor am i deserving enough to love someone
it was your humble heart and sweetest emotions that made me feel how it feels to be LOVEd and to love.....

Saturday, April 28, 2012

where is the life??

can't you see people suffering?
all i can see is in-contentment and worrying
tell me who is happy??
as far as the wanting is there
you can never be happy,

                                             people don't understand, happiness, 
                                             what they are seeking is momentary happiness,
                                             you achieve something and you think you have achieved happiness,
                                             you have rather achieved a reason to be in the state of non-happiness.

As, the very next moment you want more,
and again you perspire in accomplishing the next wish,
this is what we call cycle of Samsara.
(timoog nyid la tsimgyu med
  khorway las la tsargyu med)

                                            paradox::
                                            { never will i realize what i say,
                                              neither will you ponder what i say,
                                              this is the problem with the world
                                              what they say, they never practice, }
I ain't writing a poem,
cause for sure i ain't a poet,
but i have one thing to say,
this ain't the way, this ain't the way,
venture out, venture out,
look into the sky, see what the sky is trying to show,
listen into the silence, hear what silence has to say,
this ain't the way this ain't the way

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

in the end it does matter........

as mellifluous as the music is for ears,
as beautiful as you are to me,
as deep as the imaginations,
as fathomless are my feelings ,

                                                          effulgent you are than sun,
                                                          bless me with the rays of your love.
                                                          I fell in love with your eyes,
                                                          I fell in love with your style,
                                                          I fell in love with your existence in every way,
                                                          I fell in love with the way and to the extent I Love You,
                                                          I fell in love, that you don't love me.
                                                          i fell in love with you.............

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

facing death

Someday you have to face death. well, anyone who is born is sure to face death. Death is a negative energy, that is how we perceive it to be. but Tsogyal  Rinpoche who wrote the tibetan book of living and dying, has got completely something else to say. He says rejoice in death, while we are alive we never think of death and when the death comes it is too late to regret over things you haven't done and over the things you have done. How the thought of dying can be an optimistic vision? Well it is very obvious that if we think of death then we know the value of life, when we think of death then only we will know how to live. At the time of death what we think becomes the seed for the next life, I had this confusion always that how mere thought becomes the energy that determines our next birth? so i asked Tsogyal rinpoche la this question that how is this logical, so he responded as for example during my exam if i forget whatever i learnt then i might flunk and the next moment while he was saying he interrrupted himself and said no that isnt a good analogy, so then he said that it is logical. then he was explaining some things, some general things. the point i have here is that i was trying to make a connection with the master, (i know very naive to think like that or may be very wise, may be at some point of practice, he might help me)and yes my doubt was genuine. i was wondering about the thing since a long time, may be i have the question still unanswered in my mind. Responding to one of the question Rinpoche la said to that person "we have made a connection." I am sure that peerson is lucky(again very fool to think like that) . And then in the end he said if one reads his book(actually read, as in again and again quite mindfully) it is equal to having a teacher, he was insisting to read it again and again !!!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

In search of myself

why would one search for oneself??? 
when i try to speak something , i am scared, who knows one might contradict or one might not like it, so i end up not speaking.
when i try to do something, i am scared, what might a person who is well learned than me will think and how might he react? and i end up doing nothing...
i feel that the liberty i have in my imaginations is something that has been specially made for people like me, who has no confidence, who has indeed no talents !
I was wondering that someday will come when perfection will be acquired and then i will speak and then i will do. Haha!! that day will never come.


I am looking for who i am and what am i supposed to do?? i have no idea, may be i keep it on god, that he will take care of my tomorrow ! i have never realized that god is a concept that we have built, God is your own karma, if u do good, god will do so to you and the other way round too !! if you are reading this blog, you must be confused that what is that i am trying to convey??? to be frank even if I read this after a month, i will be like omg! what a confused man !!!